Some of my girlfriends and I are doing a bible study right now called Make Over: Revitalizing the Many Roles You Fill. It's a 6-week study but since we meet just once a month, it turns into a 6-month study for us.
We met last Sunday evening and we were studying Week Four: Mom. How fitting. Of course, I'm not a mom yet but I went through this week's lesson thinking in the future and though there were some things I couldn't really answer right now, there were other things I could address from a future standpoint -- things I desire to do or be for my kids, things I desire for my kids to do or be.
It was really quite thought-provoking and reflective for me.
I know most of my posts on this blog thus far have been more factual in nature -- what's going on with the baby and his development, what's happening at my doctor's appts, what we're doing to prepare for the baby's arrival. But today I wanted to post some things from my heart...
Day 1 of this week's study got me thinking about something along the lines of the expectations of motherhood. Though I didn't answer the question exactly, it did get me to thinking about me personally as a mom, and how I want my kids to see me:
I just want to be a mom my kids can look up to and admire, a good example for them. I want them to understand that I'm not perfect but that I try to do my best in this thing called life. I want them to observe the good, right things that I do and take hold of those, while understanding that the not-so-good things that I do are due to my imperfection and forgot about those. :) I want them to always feel loved by me and to feel like they can come to me for anything at all. I want them to know Christ, to love Him and to live their lives for Him. And I want them to want that by observing the way I live mine.
Each day of the week's lesson, we end with prayer regarding the things we've learned through that day's lesson. This is my prayer for day 1:
Heavenly Father, I thank you for providing us with this house we're living in, in a safe community, in a great nation where, right now, we can raise our kids in your ways, to know and love you. I pray that you would give us wisdom and the knowledge we need to take this parenting thing one day at a time. I pray for a desire to teach our kids all about you and not to miss any opportunity to show them how you love them. Lord, I ask that you would give us both a desperate desire to be in continual prayer for our kids no matter what stage of life they're in.
In Day 2, a question about our long-term goals for our kids came up...
...for them to know Christ, to find someone to spend their rest of their lives with in marriage, to be role models/examples for others to look to, to live a blessed life..
My prayer on Day 2:
Heavenly Father, though we don't have any kids to raise yet I'm thankful to have you to lean on as we look to the future -- as little as 3 months from now! :) I pray (again) for your wisdom and knowledge to consume us both as parents as we strive to raise this child (and others) in your ways, in your truth. I pray for stength and discernment to know when to tell our kids no and when it's okay to say yes. I pray that you would help us not to raise our kids with little responsibility but to teach them what that means, that those lessons would carry them into healthy adulthood.
On Day 3, we talked about concerns for our kids growing up and making their own decisions -- whether good or bad...
...when it's hard to let them go and make their own decisions/mistakes, we can trust that God will watch over them and protect them much more than we can...
My prayer on Day 3:
Lord Jesus, I pray again for your wisdom as we prepare to bring a precious baby boy into this world. I pray that the faith I have grown up with, that I have grown in all these years, will be evident in every aspect of my parenting. I pray, God, that our kids would be able to see you in me but that that would not be enough. Lord, help me to be diligent in pointing our kids to their Redeemer -- help me to talk about you, to ask them questions, to pray with them. Help me to know the importance, to understand just how priceless it is to lead them to you; that that is THE most important thing I could ever do for my kids.
On Day 4, we talked about our relationships (or goals for relationships) with our kids...
I want my kids to feel comfortable enough to come to us about anything, no matter how silly, embarassing, small or large it seems to them (or us); I want the wisdom to treat each case with as much seriousness as it warrants based on how my kids view it.
And this statement that the author made really stuck with me:
How we talk to our kids when they're sixteen hinges on how we've talked to them all along.
Think about it. I did. For a long while. And that shaped my prayer for Day 4:
Lord Jesus, I'm so thankful that you blessed me with parents who encouraged communication and who were always there for us growing up. I always felt like I could talk to them about anything -- we had a great relationship. I want that same thing with my kids. I pray, Lord, that you would help us to cultivate that same atmosphere in our home. I pray that we would treat our kids in such a way that they would feel comfortable coming to us about whatever, that we would listen with our whole hearts and really hear what they're saying (or not saying), and then offer them your wisdom -- the things we've learned from our relationship, our communication, with our Heavenly Father.
I know this got kind of long, but I just felt like I wanted to share some of the things on my heart concerning the impending arrival of our little one.
